#100: Radiate.

So for my 100th lesson I wanted it to be a big one...this lesson keeps presenting itself in different ways to me over the past few weeks, so I think it is worth the "big one status!"

Recently someone told me that I radiate positivity and awesomeness. I couldn't believe my ears. I even asked her if she was talking to the right person...LOL...let me explain:

2014 has really thrown me for a loop. It hasn't been bad. In fact, it has been so much good...but it has been strange. Today I called it a RUT year. I feel like I've been stuck. Mostly stuck inside my own fear and anxiety...overwhelmed with the everyday struggles that I once seemed to handle with ease. I finally realized I was in trouble and started seeing a counselor. She has really helped me organize my thoughts in a more productive way and the one thing that has been consistent is that I don't love ME.

So to hear someone say that I radiate positivity and awesomeness - well, it was shocking. It has really made me think over the past few weeks. I've talked to numerous people about the comments and everyone has agreed. I've been told things like: "You are one of the most positive people I've ever known," and "how do you keep it all together, you are awesome!" WOW...all year I've been feeling like a complete loser. Like I'm losing my mind. Like I don't know how to be good at anything...and guess what? everyone else sees the truth...I am awesome!

My only goal for 2015 is to love ME.

As a result, I will care what I put into my body and how I treat myself. I will love caring for my family because I'm good at it and they love me. I will love being in love with my best friend because he loves me. I will love sharing my successes and challenges with my friends (old and new) because they love me.

2015 will be amazing. I can't wait to LOVE ME - the me that everyone else gets to see...the me that has been hiding all year...the me that just woke up and is ready to get to work...the me that LOVES life!

 

Lesson - Radiate for yourself. Not because others need you to or because you think you have to for 10 hours a day. Love yourself enough to take care of you all the time. Get rest when you need it. Set priorities. Delegate. Say no. Enjoy your moments...you just never know when everything will change. LOVE yourself every minute you can. And when you are lost - realize it is normal. It is okay. Find those people you can lean on to show you how awesome you are when you need it.

Special thanks to all of my readers...2015 is going to be another year full of lessons...can't wait to keep sharing my mom lessons with all of you...and document more for Edwin, Lyla and Louie...who knows, someday this just might be a book! ;)